Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Are You Rich Or Not?

What makes a man rich? Is it having a large amount of money in the bank? Is it a brand new sports car? A mansion by the lakefront? Or is it having the love and support of family and friends?

The word "rich" has always been defined as having great material wealth. But the best definition of being rich is having something of great value, which goes beyond materiality and gratifies the soul.

It may surprise many, but studies show that these are the twelve real riches most sought after by man (in their order of priority):

1. A positive mental attitude
2. Sound physical health
3. Harmony in human relations
4. Freedom from fear
5. The hope of a future achievement
6. The capacity for applied faith
7. Willingness to share one's blessings with others
8. To be engaged in a labor of love
9. An open mind on all subjects toward all people
10. Complete self-discipline
11. Wisdom with which to understand people
12. Financial security

Note that money comes at the end of the list. Why? What good is money if you are despised by others? A man can be rich even when he only has a single dime in his pocket. When he gives his time to help others, he gets along well with others, he is healthy, disciplined and courageous, he is already rich.

To some people, that is not enough. It is not bad to want money, as long as it is a means to an end. The bible has said that "it is harder for a rich man to enter the gates of heaven than it is for a camel to go through the eye of a needle." Jesus was actually referring to the rich man who wouldn't give his possessions to the poor. It is selfishness that makes him not worthy to enter the gates of heaven. If you use it to help others, that's different. Money does not destroy your spirituality. It destroys you when you abuse it or when you let it control you.

If you have the desire for financial security, it is best to first acquire the first eleven riches. Then money will easily come to you.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Fantasy Football: For Women Too

If you haven't tried fantasy football yet, then maybe it's about time. It's best to do it a week or two before the regular football season starts because some players might still lose starting positions based on preseason performances.

I recently signed up at foxsports.com with the help of my husband who was the champion in his league last year. His friends and family (that includes me, of course) value his opinions and ideas about football, some of which I will now be sharing with you.

There are various sites that allow you to join fantasy football leagues for free, like nfl.com, espn.go.com, yahoosports.com or foxsports.com. All you have to do is sign up, go to their fantasy football site and join a league. You are then given an option to do either a live or automated draft. With the automated draft, you make a list of players you like and the computer automatically fills up your team for you according to the best available players. But I wouldn't recommend doing that. Do the live draft instead so you can have fun getting the players you want.


The Live Draft

This is one of the most exciting parts about fantasy football, other than watching the games and cheering for your players, of course. At a certain date and time, you and the 11 other members of your league will sit in front of your computer, enter your draft room and take turns picking players on the spot.

The person picking ahead of you might select a top RB (Running Back) or QB (Quarterback). If he happens to be the player you wanted, you'll have to choose the next best available top RB/WR/QB. On the other hand, when it's your turn to pick, you might get the top WR (Wide Receiver) who everybody else wanted (like I fortunately did with Larry Fitzgerald). So while the other members of your league will be yelling in front of their computers and going, "No! Not my top wide receiver!", you, on the other hand, will be smiling and relishing the moment.


Getting Ready for the Draft

On a sheet of paper, make a list of players you want for the top 3 key positions in the team, at least 10 for each: RB's, WR's and QB's. These are the guys who usually run, catch the ball and make the most touchdowns so naturally they are the ones who'll give you the most fantasy points.


Drafting Your Team

On the day of your live draft, get in your league at least 10 minutes earlier so you can look at the roster of players available. Now, ladies, remember that if you want your team to do well, don't pick players just because they're cute or they look good in their uniform. Pick those who rank highest according to fantasy football stats or those who have played consistently very well because they are the most likely to earn you the most points.

The first six picks are the most important because you'll need to fill your roster with very good starters to establish a good core of position players. With a live draft, if you're listed 9th on your league, that means there will be 8 persons picking ahead of you. The picking sequence may be from 1-12, then 12-1 until you have all filled up your teams.

On your first pick, take a top RB. But if the first 8 persons ahead of you have already taken the top RB's, it may be best to take a top WR.

On your second pick, if you already have a top WR, get the next best RB, or vice versa. On your third pick, get a top QB/RB/WR. If all the top QB's were already taken, take the next best available player.

In the next rounds, if the best RB's and WR's are already taken, pick those who the top QB's throw the ball to. For example, you can pick WR Randy Moss because he's one of the guys who top QB Tom Brady throws to. So even if Tom Brady is not on your fantasy team, you'll still get points when he throws a touchdown pass to Randy Moss.

The best sequence recommended for your first six picks would be: RB, WR, QB, RB/WR, TE/WR/RB, TE/WR/RB or RB, WR, RB, QB, TE/WR/RB, TE/WR/RB. With the remaining picks, look for a top TE (Tight End) and top DST (Defese Special Team) during the late rounds to fill your roster.

Make sure you watch out for your players' bye weeks. That's when they're not playing. You'll need to have back-ups, so you shouldn't draft too many players with the same bye weeks. Otherwise, you won't get points for those players during those weeks.

Pay attention to injury reports and player trades early in the year. check depth charts, news and notes on players to check up on your team. These can all be found on the sports site you signed up with. If one of your players gets hurt, say your QB Peyton Manning (knock on wood), you'll have to make trades with other members of the league, like giving up your top WR Reggie Wayne for another top QB like Aaron Rodgers.

Draft at least one player from your favorite football team so you'll enjoy watching your team and your favorite fantasy player at the same time.


Have Fun!

When you have finished drafting your own fantasy football team, you can now make a small wager with your husband, boyfriend or other friends (for example, the winner gets a steak dinner or a free car wash).

Enjoy watching the games and your fantasy football players! During a commercial break, your husband might lean over to let you know he appreciates that you're doing fantasy football with him. You both might be surprised, your team might even do better than his.










Monday, August 3, 2009

How To Pass The Wisconsin Road Test

Before taking the road test, it is important that you have already studied the driver handbook and had enough practice driving.

Below is a short study guide or checklist to easily remember and confidently execute what the examiner will ask you to do.


GETTING IN YOUR CAR

  1. Buckle up

  2. Check your mirrors

  3. Start the engine

CHECKING YOUR CONTROLS (The examiner will ask you to operate your controls before he/she gets in your car)

  1. Wipers

  2. Brake lights

  3. Turn Signals

  4. Headlights


BACKING UP

  1. Look left, right, rear* (make it obvious to the tester by turning your head enough without overdoing it)

  2. Turn signal on (to the direction you are backing)

  3. Gear on "Reverse"

  4. Look over right shoulder while backing

  5. Back slow and straight (and just once)

  6. To resume driving - check left, right, rear*

  7. Turn signal on

  8. Gear on "Drive"

  9. Turn to proper lane**


CHECK YOUR REAR MIRROR EVERY 6-8 SECONDS (on business and residential areas)


ALWAYS CHECK the SPEED LIMITS AND SIGNS (get close to but not over the speed limit)


RIGHT TURN

  1. Upon instruction and before reaching corner - look front, left, right, rear*

  2. Turn signal on (at least 100 ft)

  3. If changing lanes to go to farthest right lane - look over right shoulder (before changing lanes)

  4. If already on the farthest right lane, before actual turn - look front, left, right

  5. Turn to proper lane**


CHANGING LANES

  1. Upon instruction, look left, right, rear*

  2. Turn signal on

  3. Look over shoulder (before changing lanes)


LEFT TURN

  1. Upon instruction and before reaching corner - look front, left, right, rear*

  2. Turn left signal on (at least 100 ft)

  3. If changing lanes to go to farthest left lane, look over left shoulder (before changing lanes)

  4. If already on the farthest left lane, before actual turn - look left, right, across, left

  5. Turn on proper lane**

INTERSECTION WITH STOP

  1. In approaching intersection - look left, right, rear

  2. Slow down and stop (completely stop and yield to right traffic; if traffic is clear, resume driving)

UNCONTROLLED INTERSECTION (be alert to approaching intersections without stop signs which are usually found on sidestreets or residential areas but not on major roads)

  1. Slow down, with foot over brake (not on brake, just ready to brake)

  2. Check rear*, left, right

  3. Yield to traffic on right


PULLING TO THE CURB

  1. Look left, right, rear*

  2. Look over right shoulder

  3. Turn signal on

  4. Pull to the curb nice and slow, 1 ft from curb (use your right mirror to guide you)

  5. For hill park - turn wheels & park brake (remember in uphill park - wheels are turned left away from the curb and for downhill park - wheels are turned right towards the curb)

  6. To resume driving - look left, right, rear

  7. Turn left signal on

  8. Look over left shoulder

  9. Resume driving (accelerate smoothly)

PARALLEL PARKING

  1. Check rear*

  2. Turn right signal on

  3. Gear on "Reverse"

  4. Look over right shoulder while backing-

  5. Park 1 ft from curb, 2 ft between the cars

  6. To resume driving - look left, right, rear*

  7. Gear on "Drive"

  8. Turn left signal on

  9. Look over left shoulder

  10. Resume driving (accelerate smoothly)

Y-TURN

  1. Check rear*

  2. Look over right shoulder

  3. Turn right signal on

  4. Pull to curb

  5. Look over left shoulder

  6. Turn left signal on

  7. Make a left angle turn

  8. Look left and right

  9. Turn right signal on (to back up)

  10. Look over right shoulder while backing (slow and just once)

  11. Turn left signal on

  12. Look left and right

  13. Resume driving (accelerate smoothly)


* Rear refers to rear mirror, not looking back to the rear

** If turning left, turn to the farthest left lane; if turning right, turn to the farthest right lane; if there is a blockage or construction on the lane you're turning to, go around it and get back on that lane. More importantly, make sure you are not turning to a lane for oncoming traffic.



IMPORTANT TIPS:


  • Read and study the above checklist by trying to imagine how you would execute the above instructions.

  • Make a reviewer by rewriting the above checklist but retaining only the words in capital letters. This will make your reviewer short and easy to remember. You may customize your reviewer to include details that would help you remember.

  • Read your reviewer daily until you have memorized it.

  • Once you have the instructions for every maneuver memorized, visualize executing them calmly, smoothly and confidently as if you are doing it for real already (it helps to move your hands pretending that you're driving).

  • After practicing the above through visualization, practice in real driving with a licensed driver.

  • Read the road test study guide online at http://wwww.dot.wisconsin.gov/drivers/drivers/class-d.htm.

  • Schedule a road test appointment through the DMV web site http://www.dot.wisconsin.gov/drivers/drivers/schedule.htm or by calling 800-924-3570 (Milwaukee area).

  • Practice with a licensed driver at the DMV location where you are scheduled to take the test. Drive around to get familiar with the roads where the examiner might take you.

  • During the actual road test, don't take your cell phone with you or at least turn it off.

  • Don't forget to bring your learner's permit, check or cash and other requirements.

  • Be relaxed and friendly with your examiner. Let him/her do most of the talking. Listen attentively. If don't understand, politely ask him/her to repeat the instruction.

If you follow the above guidelines, study and practice well, you should be able to ace your road test. Good luck!



Wednesday, June 3, 2009

7 Days of Pain: What To Do When You're Having A Miscarriage

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On the 10th week of my pregnancy, May 13, 2009, I went to an OB/GYN for my first prenatal check up. She did a transvaginal ultrasound to check the growth of the fetus and determine potential problems. I was surprised when she said the gestational sac was there but she could not see the fetus, which could most probably mean a miscarriage. She ordered for another ultrasound at another hospital the following week. The radiologist there did two ultrasounds, one abdominal and another transvaginal, taking more time on the examination.

The following day, May 19, my OB/GYN told me that the results confirmed that I would be having miscarriage. She explained that although the gestational sac had grown to 8mm already, the fetus had not developed inside. She says it's not my fault and it's not because I have done something wrong. She says it just happens. I asked her if it's possible that it's still early and that the fetus could still develop. She says the chances are very slim and she didn't want me to get hopeful and disappointed. When I asked her what I should do next, she gave me three options:
  1. To wait for it to happen and let nature takes its course. Once my body recognizes that I am no longer pregnant, the body flushes out the tissues from the uterus. I should expect cramping and bleeding anytime during the next few weeks. She told me that if I had excessive bleeding (using more than one pad an hour), I should call her or go to the ER.
  2. She could give me a medicine called Misoprostol to help out flush the contents of the uterus (it sounded like some form of abortion).
  3. Undergo a procedure called D & C (dilation and curettage) to fully empty the uterus and make sure no tissues are retained to avoid an infection.

I opted to wait and let nature take its course. In the meantime, I started searching the internet to find as much information as I can. Then I realized that there was so much more the doctor didn't tell me on what I was about to go through.



What is a Miscarriage?

A miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy during the first 20 weeks. It is usually your body's way of ending a pregnancy that has had a bad start. The loss of a pregnancy can be very hard to accept. You may wonder why it happened or blame yourself. But a miscarriage is no one’s fault, and you can't prevent it.

It is shocking to learn that miscarriages are very common especially in the first three months of pregnancy. I read that about 1 in 4 pregnancies end in a miscarriage. It is even also common for a woman to have a miscarriage before she even knows that she is pregnant.


What causes a miscarriage and how is it treated?

Most miscarriages happen because the fertilized egg in the uterus does not develop normally. A miscarriage is not caused by stress, exercise, or sex. In many cases, doctors don't know what caused the miscarriage.

The risk of miscarriage is lower after the first 12 weeks of the pregnancy. No treatment can stop a miscarriage. As long as you do not have heavy blood loss, a fever, weakness, or other signs of infection, you can let a miscarriage follow its own course. This can take several days.

If you have Rh-negative blood, you will need a shot of Rhogam. This prevents problems in future pregnancies. If you have not had your blood type checked, you will need a blood test to find out if you are Rh-negative.

Many miscarriages complete on their own, but sometimes treatment is needed. If you are having a miscarriage, work with your doctor to watch for and prevent problems.

If the uterus does not clear quickly enough, you could lose too much blood or develop an infection. In this case, medicine or a procedure called a dilation and curettage (D&C) can more quickly clear tissue from the uterus.


Other Risk Factors for Miscarriage

Factors that may increase your risk of miscarriage include:

  1. Your age, especially at age 35 and older.
  2. A history of recurrent miscarriage (three or more).
  3. A history of miscarriages on your mother's side of the family.
  4. Polycystic ovary syndrome, which can cause ovulation problems, obesity, increased male hormone levels, and an increased risk of diabetes.
  5. A poorly controlled ongoing disease (such as diabetes or an autoimmune disease).
  6. Certain bacterial or viral infections during pregnancy.
  7. A blood-clotting disorder such as antiphospholipid antibody syndrome.
  8. Problems with the structure of the uterus (such as a T-shaped uterus).
  9. A history of pregnancy with a birth defect.
  10. A physical injury.
  11. Exposure to dangerous chemicals, such as benzene, arsenic, or formaldehyde, before or during pregnancy.
  12. The father's age, especially beyond age 35.

Other factors that may slightly raise miscarriage risk include:

  • Nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) use (such as ibuprofen or naproxen) at the time of conception or during early pregnancy.
  • Alcohol use during pregnancy.
  • Cigarette smoking during pregnancy.
  • Cocaine use during pregnancy.
  • A snakebite.
  • Caffeine use during pregnancy.
  • A chorionic villus sampling (CVS) or amniocentesis to test for birth defects or genetic problems. When done by a highly trained provider, one study showed that these tests have a risk of miscarriage of about 1 in 400. Some studies have shown higher risks, between 2 and 4 in 400. This greater risk may be more likely in medical centers with less experienced providers, especially for CVS.

There are also known factors that do not increase the risk of miscarriage, such as exposure to computer monitors or electric blankets, sexual intercourse, and exercise.

Tips In Dealing With a Miscarriage

A miscarriage doesn't happen all at once. It usually takes place over several days (sometimes up to two weeks), and symptoms vary. Here are some tips for dealing with a miscarriage:

  1. Use pads instead of tampons. You will probably have vaginal bleeding for a week or so. It may be like or slightly heavier than a normal period. It is normal to have mild or moderate vaginal bleeding for up to 14 days after a miscarriage. But the bleeding should not be severe. For most women, passing clots of blood from the vagina and soaking through their usual pads or tampons every hour for 2 or more hours is not normal and is considered to be severe bleeding. You may use tampons during your next period, which should start in 3 to 6 weeks.
  2. Take acetaminophen (Tylenol) for cramps. Read and follow all instructions on the label. You may have cramps for several days after the miscarriage.
  3. Eat a balanced diet that is high in iron and vitamin C. You may be low in iron because of blood loss. Foods rich in iron include red meat, shellfish, eggs, beans, and leafy green vegetables. Foods high in vitamin C include citrus fruits, tomatoes, and broccoli. Talk to your doctor about whether you need to take iron pills or a multivitamin.
  4. Talk with family, friends, or a counselor if you are having trouble dealing with the loss of your pregnancy. If you feel very sad or depressed for longer than 2 weeks, talk to a counselor or your doctor.
  5. Talk with your doctor about any future pregnancy plans. Most doctors suggest that you wait until you have had at least one normal period before you try to get pregnant again. If you don't want to get pregnant, ask your doctor about birth control options.
  6. It is important to be alert to the symptoms of a miscarriage so that you can seek medical evaluation. If you are having symptoms of a miscarriage, avoid sexual activity (called pelvic rest) and strenuous activity until your symptoms have been evaluated by a health professional.
  7. Call 911 or other emergency services immediately if you are pregnant and you have severe vaginal bleeding AND signs of shock.

Early signs of shock include:

  • Lightheadedness or a feeling that you are about to pass out.
  • Restlessness, confusion, or signs of fear.
  • Shallow, rapid breathing.
  • Moist, cool skin or possibly profuse sweating.
  • Weakness.
  • Thirst, nausea, or vomiting.
  • Abnormal increase in heart rate.

After a miscarriage, are you at risk for miscarrying again?

Miscarriage is usually a chance event, not a sign of an ongoing problem. If you have had one miscarriage, your chances for future successful pregnancies are good.

It is unusual to have three or more miscarriages in a row. But if you do, your doctor may do tests to see if a health problem may be causing the miscarriages.


Coping with a miscarriage

It is normal to go through a grieving process after a miscarriage, regardless of the length of your pregnancy. Guilt, anxiety, and sadness are common and normal reactions after a miscarriage. It is also normal to want to know why a miscarriage has happened. In most cases a miscarriage is a natural event that could not have been prevented.

To help you and your family cope with your loss, consider meeting with a support group, reading about the experiences of other mothers, and talking to friends or a counselor or member of the clergy.

The intensity and duration of the grief varies from woman to woman, but most women find that they can return to the daily demands of life in a fairly short time. It is important to call your health professional if you have symptoms of depression that last for more than 2 weeks. The loss and the hormonal swings that result from a miscarriage can cause symptoms like postpartum depression.

A healthy, full-term pregnancy is possible for most women who have had a miscarriage, and even after having repeated miscarriages. If you want to become pregnant again, check with your doctor or nurse-midwife. Most health professionals recommend waiting until you have had at least one normal menstrual period before attempting to become pregnant after a miscarriage.


My Experience

A few days after being informed of my miscarriage, I started having light brown spottings. At 4 a.m. of May 26, I woke up from light cramping and a bright red discharge which intensified during the day. I started passing out large tissues/clots of blood which required frequent trips to the bathroom. The bleeding and cramping became so unbearable by 5 p.m. that my whole body felt cold and I felt like throwing up. When I went to the bathroom, I passed on a very large tissue which I thought was the gestational sac.

I took two Advils (200 mg each) which helped the pain subside. I noticed that every time I felt unbearable pain (despite the painkillers), I would pass on large tissues. I tried listening to my body, and learned that whenever I get intense pain or discomfort, it usually meant it wants to get rid of something. So I try to sit and wait for a few more minutes in the bathroom every time. The bleeding and cramping gradually subsided as each day passed. I would experience heavy bleeding and cramping for about an hour or more but I would feel better after each pass.

On the fifth day, around 5 p.m., I felt another intense discomfort and pain so I went into the bathroom and stayed there for a while. A few minutes after, I suddenly felt a gush of large tissue. When I looked at it, I was astonished to see a large sausage-like structure, looking more like the gestational sac, with its end looking like it was detached from something, most likely the uterus. At that instant, I felt a massive feeling of relief and lightness and my stomach felt empty. The cramps and the intense pain were gone.

On June 1, I went to see my OB/GYN and gave her an account of what happened. She did a transvaginal ultrasound and told me that my uterus is already empty and that it was good I had flushed out everything naturally. I was relieved to know there was no retained tissue and I didn't need to have a D & C. She said that the bleeding should subside more in a few days and that I should wait for a couple of months if I decide to try getting pregnant again.

Today I am grateful for being free from pain and recovering from the loss. I feel blessed to have the support of family and friends in helping me go through the process. I learned that maintaining a positive attitude helps the body heal faster.

It's amazing how the human body works and how many of us don't realize that it is a wondrous miracle all by itself.